PAPAI
OFFICE OF TICKET PROCESSING · DEPT. OF DEFERRED ACTIONS · ROOM 1024
DOCUMENTFORM 1-A
CLASSGENERAL
REV.14 · V · MMXXVI
STATUSON FILE

The bureaucrat
in your group chat.

papai reads every line in your chat and turns the actionable ones into stamped, numbered tickets.

ABSTRACT

Routed, tagged, linked to the right epic — usually under a second. Self-hosted. MIT-licensed. Bring your own LLM key, your own tracker, your own group chat.

SUBMIT REQUEST → READ THE STATUTES

One
sentence.
One stamp.

A Telegram complaint becomes a tracked ticket, linked to the right epic, with a humane reply — in under a second.

END-TO-END
0.92s
TOOL-CALLS
2
HALLUCINATIONS
0
DROPS
0
CASE LOG WEB-318 · 14·V·26 · 09:42 WET FILED · 0.92s
09:42:18.04
@diogo TG · #web-platform
high-priority bug: login crashes on Safari when 2FA is on
09:42:18.21
create_task(project="web", priority="high", title="login crashes on Safari w/ 2FA", labels=["auth","safari"])
↳ OK · WEB-318 · 132ms
09:42:18.41
create_relation(type="subtask", child="WEB-318", parent="WEB-117")
↳ OK · 28ms
09:42:18.96
papai TG · #web-platform
Filed WEB-318 in web · High. Tagged it ‘auth, safari’. Made it a subtask of WEB-117 (2FA rollout). Ana added as watcher.
09:43:02.17
@diogo TG · #web-platform
thx

Six cabinets.
Twenty-three drawers.

Each drawer is a small, capability-gated verb. No drawer is opened in error.

01
TASKS
The Lifecycle Cabinet

Filed, tagged, routed, confirmed — in one sentence. Reactions on existing comments count as votes.

create · update · search · comment · react · subtask
02
MEMOS
The Pocket Notebook

Save it now. papai brings it back the next time its topic is mentioned within earshot.

save · recall · promote · search
03
REMIND
The Future-Self Department

Thursday 09:00. Every standup. Before SSL expires. The schedule is logged.

once · daily · weekly · cron
04
ATTACH
The Manifest Bureau

Drop the file. We hash it, stage it via S3-compatible storage, attach it to the correct case file.

upload · attach · list · remove
05
FETCH
The Reading Room

Public URLs only, politely rate-limited. The summary is what changed — not the entire page.

fetch · extract · summarize · cite
06
LINK
The Cross-Reference Index

The 2FA epic remains the epic after sprint planning. The graph survives the reorg.

blocks · duplicates · related · subtask

Speaks what
you already speak.

FORM
SURFACE
SCOPE
STATUS
3-TG
Telegram
DM · Groups · Topics
LIVE
3-MM
Mattermost
DM · Channels · Threads
LIVE
3-DC
Discord
DM · @-mention only
LIVE
3-KO
Kaneo
Issue tracker
LIVE
3-YT
YouTrack
Issue tracker
LIVE
3-AI
OpenAI-compatible
Bring your own key
REQUIRED
3-S3
S3 / R2 / B2
Object storage
OPTIONAL
3-??
Your surface
Adapter SDK
PENDING

File the
paperwork.
That's it.

Bun. SQLite. Optional S3 hook. Optional Compose bundle. Survives on a Raspberry Pi under a desk.

SIGN HERE →
github.com/papai · 60s to live bot
FORM 9-D · DEPLOYMENT · 4 LINES ~60s
$ git clone [email protected]:papai/papai && cd papai
$ bun install
$ cp .env.example .env && $EDITOR .env
$ bun start
# papai is now on file. DM the bot. Run /setup.

On the record.

FILEHE-001
"Replaced a Slack→Jira pipeline that took three sprints with a four-line .env and a Telegram group."
HELENA MARÇAL
ENG MGR · LISBOA
FILEPA-014
"Writes tickets the way our designers write them — short, with the right tags, linked to the right epic."
PÁDRAIG Ó CONGHAILE
HEAD OF PRODUCT · DUBLIN
FILEJO-027
"Runs on the same €4 Hetzner box as our blog. Telegram → ticket in under a second."
JONAS WEBER
STAFF SRE · ZÜRICH

Your request
has been
received.

papai is filed under MIT. One binary. Five minutes from clone to first stamp.

FILE PAPAI → READ THE DOCS v1.3 · MIT · Bun 1.3+
© MMXXVI · D. LAZAREV · MIT LICENSE · ALL FORMS REQUIRED v1.3.2 · 8a7c12d · 14·V·26 · END OF DOCUMENT